Many neurodiverse people struggle with sensory processing issues. One common one is auditory processing. The person is unable to comprehend what was said in the moment. Neurodiverse people learn to cope with this deficit in different ways. One way is to respond based on visual cues while waiting for the auditory information to be processed. While adaptive, this coping strategy can be hard to pinpoint, leaving the neurodivergent person confused about their own behavior.
What is Sensory Processing
Humans have seven senses: sight, hearing, smell, taste, tactile, proprioceptive and vestibular. You have probably heard of the first five but the last two are often overlooked. Proprioceptive input is the sense we get from our muscles and joints. Vestibular is the sense that tells us when we feel dizzy. People who have a difficult time processing sensory information misinterpret the strength of different input to senses. Some people have one or two senses impacted, others have difficulties with all of the senses.
A person may be hypo-senstive or hyper-sensitive to any sense. Hypo-sensitive means that the brain turns down the volume on these senses. They may not notice input and are often referred to as “sensory seekers”. Hyper-sensitive means that the brain turns up the volume on these senses. They are extra aware of input and are often referred to as “sensory avoiders”. Others are both hyper and hypo sensitive based on the situation and input type.
A sensory profile refers to the unique combination of sensory issues a neurodivergent person experiences. Some senses could be hypo-sensitive, others hyper-sensitive, maybe both hyper and hypo and some not impacted at all. For instance, a person may be overly sensitive to sounds and avoid loud noises, be under sensitive to touch and seek out rough textures while having no issues with their vision.
Auditory Processing
I have a difficult time processing auditory information. My ears work perfectly fine. I know that someone is saying something but the words do not reach my brain as quickly as they do for other people. Think about being in a large stadium and someone is singing the National Anthem. You can see that they have hit the final note and start to clap before you actually hear the final note. When someone is speaking to me, I do not actually hear what the person said until I have finished my response.
Autopilot
I noticed that in busy places, new places and emotionally charged conversations I cannot comprehend what is being said yet I respond automatically. I named this feeling “autopilot”. During autopilot mode my auditory system is lagging and my visual system is compensating for this deficit.
Communication is thought to be 55% body language, 38% tone of voice and only 7% words. Since the words are delayed in reaching my brain, I’ve learned to cope by looking at their facial expressions, body language and contextual cues to respond appropriately. Being autistic I have learned a lot of verbal and behavioral scripts over the years and use those scripts to respond fairly appropriately based solely on visual cues. It isn’t until I finished speaking that I comprehend what the person said. I think about what I wish I had said but realize that it’s too late. The conversation is already moving along and I need to pay attention to the next exchange. This pattern snowballs as the conversation continues and I often leave feeling completely exhausted.
From the outside this behavior could look like schmoozing, people pleasing or even ditziness. Autopilot mode does not want to be discovered and does not want to get me into any trouble so it generally reflects back whatever mood fits the situation. If someone is excited, happy, curious, annoyed or tired I reflect back the same tone to continue the conversation. If someone is worried, scared or angry I typically use a de-escalation script to make the situation less intense. At times my responses don’t quite hit the mark but are usually close enough that the person continues speaking.
Consequences
This coping skill works pretty well in surface level social interactions. It allows me to make acquaintances and get through most social situations at parties, stores, banks, restaurants, parks and meetings. Autopilot has given me the opportunity to function based in a neurotypical world where things are often busy and new.
Within my personal life I have set up situations where I have enough time to process and comprehend what was said. I usually feel the most connected to people who naturally give me a moment to respond without realizing they are doing it. With that extra moment to respond they get to see the real me. Those people become very special to me and I keep them close.
Even with these close people, there are times when things become emotionally charged. Autopilot is not helpful in those situations. I respond in ways that make me feel misunderstood because my words did not match my thoughts. Meanwhile the other person may feel duped, manipulated or confused by my reactions. Especially after I get the chance to share how I truly felt the whole time. I’ve had to repair a lot of relationships over the years. Some people did not accept my apology and its been hard losing those people.
Support and Accommodations
People with auditory processing difficulties have good days and bad days. Some days they may be minimally impacted and others it could be disabling. Factors like sleep, blood sugar levels, dehydration, hormonal fluctuations and emotional distress all contribute to increased sensory processing issues. Creating a stable and consistent schedule with sensory needs incorporated in helps many people with all sorts of sensory processing difficulties, including auditory processing.
Sensory processing issues are not the end of the world. Plenty of neurodivergent people have them and find accommodations to be successful. Explaining these issues and having open conversations with loved ones is necessary. Accommodations might include changing the environment to make it less stimulating, having the person respond in writing, finding a career that doesn’t require a lot of social interactions. One interesting accommodation that came out of the pandemic was the use of zoom with captions. Seeing what someone is saying in real-time is helpful for those with average or above average reading abilities. The goal is to get the person into their optimal environment so they can unlock their full potential.